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Alcohollywood

Every week, join Clint and Jared (and selected guest panelists) as they discuss, disseminate and make drinking rules for films both good and bad. Sit down with each film's signature cocktail and enjoy!
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Alcohollywood
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Now displaying: November, 2012
Nov 29, 2012

This week on Alcohollywood, we praise Crom with our review and drinking game to 1982's Conan the Barbarian, the John Milius flick that put Arnold Schwarzenegger on the map! This silent, episodic epic follows the eponymous barbarian (Schwarzenegger) on his quest for revenge against the warlord-turned-cult leader Thulsa Doom (James Earl Jones), joined by his friends Valeria (Sandahl Bergman) and Subatai (Mongolian Sonny Bono).

With a huge and bombastic score from Basil Pouledoris, fantastic camerawork, and an unconventional 80s feel, it's definitely worth a watch, even if the pace drags a bit. Luckily, we'll help you crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women with our custom cocktail and drinking rules!

Nov 23, 2012

This week on Alcohollywood, we're ushering in the new Spielberg film (Lincoln) with one of his last films named after the surname of one of the main characters - Hook! This 1991 nostalgia misfire, starring Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman, explores what happens if Peter Pan wakes up and becomes a cynical workaholic lawyer who ignores his kids, complete with floppy '90s cellphone.

When the nasty Captain Hook (Hoffman) kidnaps his kids to bait Peter to come back, Tinkerball (a distracted Julia Roberts) must drag him kicking and screaming back to Neverland and train him for the fight of his life against Hook. Does it still hold up twenty years later? Check out our review and drinking game here!

Nov 15, 2012

The name’s Bond….James Bond! This week, Alcohollywood is doing its first New Release with the latest James Bond film Skyfall, in which James Bond (Daniel Craig) deals with the specter (get it?) of his childhood and his empty life as a spy, all while melding the gritty Bourne-era Craig Bonds with more traditional elements. Here, an attack on M (Judi Dench) brings Bond back out of the shadows, in order to track down her potential killer and a list of undercover spies that is threatened to be released by flamboyant villain Raoul Silva (Javier Bardem). Throw in a couple Bond girls, a new Q (Ben Whishaw) and Ralph Fiennes channeling a more serious John Steed from his Avengers movie, and you’ve got a great cast bolstered through strong direction from Sam Mendes, absolutely gorgeous cinematography from Roger Deakins, and a wonderful score from Thomas Newman (pinch-hitting for David Arnold) to create a fantastic Bond movie that attempts – for better or worse – to bring the character a bit more dimension, and question the validity of these kinds of movies in today’s technological world.

Nov 8, 2012

Remember Dorf? Those 1980s VHS tapes with Tim Conway where he plays a dwarf golf instructor by standing in a hole in the ground, with tennis shoes glued where his knees are to simulate having shorter legs? This week on Alcohollywood, we’re finally tackling one of those hit “cult bad movies” you kids these days seem to like so much – Tiptoes! This time around, we get to see the “Dorf effect” be given to acclaimed actor Gary Oldman, in what the schizophrenic trailer claims is “the role of a lifetime.” I assume this means that, after you do it once, you have enough sense not to do it again. Either way, the film vacillates between (attempts at) a tender drama of midget relations and the complexities of starting a new family – personified by bored and confused thespians Matthew McConaughey and Kate Beckinsale – and a wacky comedy about just how funny those midgets are. Co-starring real dwarf actor Peter Dinklage as a greasy French Marxist and Patricia Arquette as a dumb-as-nails drifter, this film is as perplexing as it is misguided. Luckily, we’ve got our custom cocktail, some drinking rules, and frequent guest Julia, who joins us for a quiz! Take a listen:

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