Merry Christmas and happy holidays from the folks at Alcohollywood! For the holiday season, we're tackling yet another unconventional Christmas film - the 1985 dystopian cult classic Brazil, directed by Terry Gilliam! In this 1984-on-crack world of steampunk Britain, mild-mannered accountant Sam Lowry (Jonathan Pryce) tries to track down the girl of his dreams while stymied by stunted bureaucracy, terrorist attacks and intrusive family and friends.
The result is a wonderfully realized, dreamlike and endlessly entertaining flick that is evocative of the best science fiction and Expressionist films in film history. Luckily, we've got the perfect cocktail and rules to accompany you on this adventure - just be sure to bring the right paperwork!
It's the end of the world, and we feel tipsy - this week on Alcohollywood, we watch the Roland Emmerich disaster flick 2012 and figure out just how worried we should be about the coming Mayan apocalypse (Hint: not at all). Follow John Cusack and a bloated ensemble cast of international actors, all slumming it for cash, as they alternately engage in philosophical hand-wringing about the end of the world and evade one CGI sequence after another.
Despite some engaging disaster porn, it's still pretty overlong, and you can see entire characters and plot progressions lifted wholesale from Emmerich's previous disaster flicks (Independence Day, Godzilla, and The Day After Tomorrow). At the same time, we've got a custom cocktail and drinking rules to get you through to the other side!
Harry Connickuh everybody! In celebration of that, we check in with Little Man Tate, the 1991 kid dramedy starring (and directed by) Jodie Foster. Foster plays Dede, a working class mom in New York who struggles to raise her little man, Fred Tate, a young genius, and the pressures of celebrity and achievement coming from the early-90s obsession with kid geniuses. Connick himself also stars (well, cameos) as a charismatic college student who teaches Fred the ways of pool and awkwardly walking in on someone having sex.
Despite its good intentions, the film's a bit of a slog, and most of the characters (particularly Fred) don't have the charisma to carry a feature film. Nonetheless, give it a shot and find out what you think, bolstered by our custom cocktail and rules!
This week on Alcohollywood, we check out the 1980s Danny Devito-directed comedy Throw Momma from the Train, starring DeVito as a schlubby mama's boy who, wishing the death of his mother (Anne Ramsey, The Goonies) gets mixed up in a Strangers on a Train-like bargain with his struggling writing teacher (Billy Crystal) to kill his mom in exchange for her lamprey-like ex-wife.
The result is a surprisingly hilarious and darkly comic buddy piece, with Crystal and Devito giving career-high performances bolstered by a strong, genuinely witty script and nuggets of magical realism in the strange world of the film (one of Devito's hallmarks as a filmmaker). Throw yourself off the wagon with our custom cocktail and drinking rules!
This week on Alcohollywood, we praise Crom with our review and drinking game to 1982's Conan the Barbarian, the John Milius flick that put Arnold Schwarzenegger on the map! This silent, episodic epic follows the eponymous barbarian (Schwarzenegger) on his quest for revenge against the warlord-turned-cult leader Thulsa Doom (James Earl Jones), joined by his friends Valeria (Sandahl Bergman) and Subatai (Mongolian Sonny Bono).
With a huge and bombastic score from Basil Pouledoris, fantastic camerawork, and an unconventional 80s feel, it's definitely worth a watch, even if the pace drags a bit. Luckily, we'll help you crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of the women with our custom cocktail and drinking rules!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're ushering in the new Spielberg film (Lincoln) with one of his last films named after the surname of one of the main characters - Hook! This 1991 nostalgia misfire, starring Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman, explores what happens if Peter Pan wakes up and becomes a cynical workaholic lawyer who ignores his kids, complete with floppy '90s cellphone.
When the nasty Captain Hook (Hoffman) kidnaps his kids to bait Peter to come back, Tinkerball (a distracted Julia Roberts) must drag him kicking and screaming back to Neverland and train him for the fight of his life against Hook. Does it still hold up twenty years later? Check out our review and drinking game here!
The name’s Bond….James Bond! This week, Alcohollywood is doing its first New Release with the latest James Bond film Skyfall, in which James Bond (Daniel Craig) deals with the specter (get it?) of his childhood and his empty life as a spy, all while melding the gritty Bourne-era Craig Bonds with more traditional elements. Here, an attack on M (Judi Dench) brings Bond back out of the shadows, in order to track down her potential killer and a list of undercover spies that is threatened to be released by flamboyant villain Raoul Silva (Javier Bardem). Throw in a couple Bond girls, a new Q (Ben Whishaw) and Ralph Fiennes channeling a more serious John Steed from his Avengers movie, and you’ve got a great cast bolstered through strong direction from Sam Mendes, absolutely gorgeous cinematography from Roger Deakins, and a wonderful score from Thomas Newman (pinch-hitting for David Arnold) to create a fantastic Bond movie that attempts – for better or worse – to bring the character a bit more dimension, and question the validity of these kinds of movies in today’s technological world.
Remember Dorf? Those 1980s VHS tapes with Tim Conway where he plays a dwarf golf instructor by standing in a hole in the ground, with tennis shoes glued where his knees are to simulate having shorter legs? This week on Alcohollywood, we’re finally tackling one of those hit “cult bad movies” you kids these days seem to like so much – Tiptoes! This time around, we get to see the “Dorf effect” be given to acclaimed actor Gary Oldman, in what the schizophrenic trailer claims is “the role of a lifetime.” I assume this means that, after you do it once, you have enough sense not to do it again. Either way, the film vacillates between (attempts at) a tender drama of midget relations and the complexities of starting a new family – personified by bored and confused thespians Matthew McConaughey and Kate Beckinsale – and a wacky comedy about just how funny those midgets are. Co-starring real dwarf actor Peter Dinklage as a greasy French Marxist and Patricia Arquette as a dumb-as-nails drifter, this film is as perplexing as it is misguided. Luckily, we’ve got our custom cocktail, some drinking rules, and frequent guest Julia, who joins us for a quiz! Take a listen:
Welcome to the second episode of Alcoholloween, as we finish up HORROR OCTORBOR!, our month of Stephen King films, with the 1982 horror anthology Creepshow! Here, dated and wacky cartoon transitions from George A. Romero (Night of the Living Dead) speed us along five tales of terror. Prepare for two hours of: a vengeful father who just wants his cake; a dumb yokel (a blissfully rare acting role from King himself) finding a meteor with strange properties; a vengeful husband takes his sadistic jollies from torturing his wife and her lover; a strange Yeti in a crate helps a weak-willed husband solve the problem of his shrewish wife; and finally, a Scrooge-like germophobe deals with a pernicious bug problem. The film is full of 80s kitsch, so be prepared for that - we'll help you along the way with our custom cocktail and drinking rules!
This week on Alcohollywood, we check in to the Overlook Hotel with 1980s Stanley Kubrick film The Shining, as we continue HORROR OCTORBOR! Watch the slow but intense haunting of the Torrances, who care for the hotel by themselves, with the help of fantastic cinematography, chilling performances and a haunting sense of atmosphere that makes thus truly one of the best Stephen King adaptations to date (even if King himself doesn't think so). Along with this, we can descend into alcoholism right with Jack along with our drinking game and custom cocktail!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're headed back to the 1980s with the Stephen King-written werewolf flick Silver Bullet, starring Gary Busey as alcoholic-yet-fun uncle Red, who helps handicapped Corey Haim track down a werewolf that's killing the increasingly-simpleminded denizens of his small Maine town. Luckily, they've got the help of their spunky sister, a bunch of unfounded assumptions, and Corey's flipping-sweet motorized wheelchair, the "Silver Bullet"! Keep a look out for other actors who probably shouldn't be here, including Terry O'Quinn as the well-meaning town sheriff, Everett McGill as a preacher with a terrible secret (SPOILER: he's the werewolf), and Lawrence Tierney as the town bartender. Bite into our custom cocktail and drinking rules for Silver Bullet!
This week on Alcohollywood, we’re continuing HORROR OCTORBOR! by sitting through the three-hour miniseries IT, starring a bevy of B-level actors at the height of their popularity in the early nineties, plus a “special appearance” by Tim Curry as the titular character! Let’s get the Stephen King checklist out: After a group of seven kids (check) in a small town in Maine (check) destroy a creature that preys on their everyday fears (check), the kids – one of whom is a famous horror author (check) – must return to this town as adults to defeat the monster and recapture their childhood. This one’s a bit of a slog, but it terrified audiences in 1990, so we thought we’d check it out. Will Pennywise the Clown steal these kids’ souls, or will he be defeated by a slingshot and naive belief? Check out our rules, drink and review below!
This week on Alcohollywood, we start HORROR OCTORBOR!, where we celebrate Halloween by reviewing and drinking to Stephen King adaptations! To begin, we tackle the 2007 thriller 1408, starring John Cusack, Samuel L. Jackson and one evil fucking room. In typical Stephen King fashion, the main character is a cynical horror writer (Cusack) with family issues who investigates a notoriously scary hotel room in New York – you can guess what happens next. The movie is, if nothing else, great for fridge freakouts, Samuel L. Jackson’s sly performance, and some great, atmospheric direction from Mikael Halfstrom. Check it out along with our review and drinking game, and our custom cocktail!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're getting in touch with our feminine sides with frequent guest Julia, as we cover the Drew Barrymore late-90s you-go-girl fairytale Ever After, costarring Anjelica Huston and Dougray Scott! This retelling of the Cinderella fable takes away all the magic and plops the story into a loose version of 16th-century France, complete with anachronistic Leonardo DaVinci and games of rock-paper-scissors.
This time around, young cinder girl Danielle (Barrymore) attempts to find love and assert her girl power while wooing the young Prince Henry (Scott) under the nose of wicked stepmother Rodmilla (Huston). Regardless of your gender, we've just got the magic potion to accompany your next viewing of this slice of 1990s cheese!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're giving you a double-dose of action with the French parkour thrill rides District B13 and District 13: Ultimatum! These mid-2000s French action pics, produced by Luc Besson, follow a cop (Cyril Raffaelli) and a thief (parkour co-founder David Belle) as they save the downtrodden residents of District 13, a walled-up ghetto in future Paris, from both overly-ambitious gangsters and an uncaring, homocidal dystopian government. Filled with wonderfully choreographed fight scenes and an unexpected dash of energy and humor, the District B13 series is definitely a great dose of Jackie Chan-esque kinetic thrills. In order to fuel your need for wall-jumps and crazy flips, we've got just the drink and rules to get you through these two films!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're delving into the world of Dirty Harry with his fifth, final and most unfortunate installment, The Dead Pool! Join hard-boiled detective Harry Callahan (a rapidly aging and crotchety Clint Eastwood) and his new Asian sidekick as they solve a series of murders related to a betting pool called The Dead Pool. Along the way, enjoy early roles from Patricia Clarkson (as Harry's reporter love interest), Liam Neeson (as an effete British director/prime suspect) and Jim Carrey (as a strung-out rock star who becomes one of the killer's first victims). This cop movie is mired in 80s excess, and a creaky Clint Eastwood; luckily, however, we've got the drink and the rules to get you through it - take a listen and hear our thoughts!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're headed back to our roots by tackling a Steven Spielberg film for the first time since our first episode! This time around, we're doing his very first movie, the made-for-TV thriller Duel, starring Dennis Weaver as a nebbish 1970s wimp dealing with the worst case of road rage imaginable - the unseen driver of a monstrous, murderous semi truck that seems to stop at nothing to terrorize him.
The result is either a wonderfully Expressionistic, abstract look at the nature of the rapidly emasculating man set against the road-trip atmosphere of the American 70s, or a sweet horror movie about man vs. truck, however you want to look at it! Whatever your perspective on the film, we've got the drink and the drinking game to spice up the proceedings, so start your engines!
This week on Alcohollywood, we celebrate our 50th episode with some of our previous guests (Rachel from our Captain America episode, Julia from several of our episodes, Craig from our Fellini Satyricon episode, and Nick from our Independence Day episode) to watch the Wolfgang Peterson children's fantasy film The NeverEnding Story! Join Bastian Balthazar Bux (Barret Oliver) as we watch him reading a book, while learning the tale of young warrior Atreyu (Noah Hathaway) and his fight to save the kingdom of Fantasia from the Nothing!
We also announce the winner of our Alcohollywood Drinking Game Contest: user TTBF from SA, who gives us this drinking game for the podcast:
"Rule 1: Drink anytime for laughter - It doesn't matter if it is laughter, a giggle, a snort, or any other audible form of finding something humorous. Drink for it.
Rule 2: Drink anytime technical aspects of a film are mentioned - Cinematogaphy, blocking, lighting, mise en scene, and even motifs.
Rule 3: Drink every time someone goes off topic - Whether it to be discuss other movies an actor's been in, some hard science, or other such things. Optional addition: Include skipping around in the movie as being off-topic.
Finish your drink line: Finish your drink when you hear any variant of 'And that brings us to our finish your drink line.'"
(NOTE: Beware that this episode is filled with more alcohol-fueled antics than normal, as well as a couple stuffy noses.)
This week on Alcohollywood, we're finally tiptoeing our way into Nicolas Cage territory with the 1988 horror-comedy Vampire's Kiss! Follow high-powered literary agent Peter Loew (Cage) as he slowly loses his mind after an encounter with a young woman who is potentially a vampire (Jennifer Beals).
Apart from that bare-bones plot, watch as Cage kills pigeons, shouts at his secretary (Maria Conchita Alonso), and generally overacts himself into oblivion. Luckily, we've got our custom drink and rules (well, one rule) for you to get through this 80s gem!
Happy Shark Week, everyone! In order to celebrate this hallowed occasion, we’re taking to the high seas with a quirkier brand of marine science with Wes Anderson’s 2004 indie flick The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou! The titular oceanographer (Bill Murray) goes after the fabled (and animated) jaguar shark, with the help of his estranged maybe-son (Owen Wilson), a perniciously pregnant reporter (Cate Blanchett) and a crew of marine biologists, documentary filmmakers and David Bowie cover artists.
With the typical Wes Anderson traits of quirky music, 1970s-era color palettes and deliberately flat acting, The Life Aquatic is deserving of at least a review, if not our signature cocktail and drinking game!
Jared and Clint from Alcohollywood (along with photographer/frequent guest Julia) just got back from Wizard World Chicago Comic Con, a four-day extravaganza of comics, celebrities and costumes in Rosemont, IL, and we've got coverage! In this special podcast, we give our impressions of the things we found there (Avengers colognes, Poison Ivys, sometimes-misogynist paintings of comic book characters), plus quite a few interviews with groups and organizations there.
In addition to that, we had the unique privilege of getting a few minutes in with noted actor James Hong (Blade Runner, Big Trouble in Little China, Kung Fu Panda), who imparted his wisdom on wine, voice acting, and the state of Asian and Asian-American actors in the film industry today.
Special thanks go to James Hong, Ghostbusters Chicago Division, Gorilla Tango Burlesque, 501st Legion Midwest Garrison, Zombie Squad Chicago, Jurassic Park Legacy and all the other amazing groups that we met throughout the convention, as well as the staff of Wizard World themselves for their graciousness and support!
This week on Alcohollywood, we handle one of the stranger films we’ve ever come across: the 1978 Italian knock-off of Star Wars, Starcrash! Follow the adventures of sexy-yet-useless Stella Starr (Caroline Munro) and her mysterious, Jewfro-ed alien ally Akton (Marjoe Gortner) as they search for Prince Simon (David Hasselhoff) before the evil Couth Zarth Arn can defeat the Emperor of the First Circle of the Universe (Christopher Plummer). Confused yet? So were we! With a nonsensical plot, laughable effects and inexplicably awful acting, this Roger Corman co-production is one of the greater guilty pleasures we have come across, and so we decided to give it the Alcohollywood treatment!
This week on Alcohollywood, we're gearing up for this year's latest unnecessary remake by revisiting the 1990 sci-fi classic Total Recall! In this Philip K Dick adaptation, surprisingly Austrian Douglas Quaid (Arnold Schwarzenegger) goes to get an exciting fantasy implanted into his brain, only to find out he's already living it...or is he?
A great combination of gore and classic Arnold action combined with a thought-provoking idea or two and one of Jerry Goldsmith's best scores, you'll have a blast along with our custom cocktail and rules! Check them out below!
This week on Alcohollywood, Jared and Clint (and special guest Craig) tackle one of the most flat-out crazy and out-there movies any of us have ever seen - the dreamlike, episodic 1969 tale of Roman debauchery Fellini Satyricon! Directed by famed Italian director Federico Fellini, this strange, bawdy and extremely Roman escapade follows a pair of Romans as they explore what it means to live in the empty excess of Rome...plus minotaurs. It's a real treat if you haven't seen it, but be prepared to be confused and amazed!
On the eve of the release of The Dark Knight Rises, we here at Alcohollywood decided to check out one of the more infrequently-discussed films in the Nolan oeuvre - 2006's The Prestige, starring Christian Bale, Hugh Jackman, Scarlett Johanssen and Michael Caine! The film follows two rival magicians whose constant need to outdo each other leads them to increasingly monstrous acts, while Michael Caine watches on dispassionately and gives poignant monologues.
With the dreamlike quality of Inception and a cast consisting of half the active superheroes in Hollywood (Batman, Wolverine, Black Widow, David Bowie), The Prestige is definitely not to be overlooked!